Do you love others without attachment? Through my ongoing dialogue with the Divine, I’m learning that loving with attachment is the ego’s default way of loving. To love without attachment requires us to love with a much greater love – God’s love.
I was very surprised by God’s answer when I asked how to love without attachment:
When you heal many wounds, as you have Noemi Grace, this helps you to love more deeply. Then the ego comes in, sensing a good thing in your love for others and their love for you, and it wants more.
The ego attempts to control love
The ego is never satisfied with what you have. It always wants more and it fears that you may lose what you have, so it clings to love.
The ego needs love. Its primary need is love, followed by validation, acceptance, support, and even adulation.
The ego is needy. In your deep love, which is rooted in Divine love, the ego senses a way for its needs to be met. When it detects love flowing between you and another person, it clings, attaches, imagines, daydreams of more love, schemes of ways to get more, and goes after more.
In the short-term, this feels really good, as the ego basks in the feelings of love – which are pure chemistry – and in the meaning it ascribes to those feelings.
The ego creates attachments
The ego wants to sustain those feelings because they temporarily meet its need for love. To do this, it creates attachments, like tentacles or hooks, which join you to another person.
The ego uses those attachments to feed off the other person’s energy and its memories of love. The other person’s ego is likely doing the same thing.
Thus both people feed off the other person’s energy, the memories of past feelings of love, and fantasies of future experiences of love.
This energy feeding keeps you out of the present moment, which is the only time and place where you can experience unconditional love. And it keeps you stuck in your ego, which lives in your mind and not in your heart. This whole mechanism of attachments and feeding even becomes a substitute for unconditional love.
The ego even views its creation of attachments and energy feeding as preferable to unconditional love. It can’t trust that love will always be available, so it attempts to control its access to love by creating a self-sustaining love machine to feed it and nurture its needs.
I never heard anything like this before and I said to the Divine, “This is not the kind of love I want to experience. Yet this sounds like an unconscious process. How can we free ourselves from it?”
Free yourself from the love machine
This is an unconscious process, yet you can be free of it. To free yourself, you must return to your Source. Be willing to source yourself and your life in Divine unconditional love rather than in the ego’s love machine.
Learn to recognize the presence of the love machine: the feelings, memories, fantasies, scheming, and grasping at control. Become aware of when the ego’s love machine wants to take over and instead choose to return to Divine love.
Open your heart to receive Divine love and allow it to fill you. If you love yourself with Divine love, you will love others with this love as well.
When you love others with Divine love, you free yourself to love without attachment. This takes practice.
The love machine is a substitute for Divine love
The ego’s love machine is entrenched in your mind and has become as much a part of your survival as food is. It has even become an addiction for many of you, who crave the “feel good” chemicals it releases, like oxytocin and endorphins.
Of course, you want this chemical experience. Your brains are programmed to seek what feels good, even if what creates those feelings is not real, even if it is a love machine.
The ego’s machine is also a substitute for Divine love, which creates the same chemical reaction. But Divine love brings with it deep fulfillment, peace, and freedom from the ego’s needy clinging.
To free yourself, you must become aware of the ego’s love machine and recognize when the ego turns it on. Also recognize it as an impostor, a substitute for unconditional love, yet see it with eyes of love.
Then be willing to disconnect yourself from the love machine and the feel-good feelings it creates. Instead, choose to connect with Divine love, which is unconditional, deeply satisfying, and never runs out.
Divine love frees you to love without attachment
When you learn to love yourself with Divine love and love others the same way, you stop feeding the ego’s love machine. Then you can feed on the inexhaustible supply of deep pure love, which is Divine, unconditional, and conscious.
This love frees you from the impostor of love with attachment and all of the ego’s needs, expectations, and demands.
Fill yourself with Divine pure love and let the ego’s love machine rest in peace. Allow Divine love to spread in you until it flows out of you to your loved ones, acquaintances, and even to the whole world.
Then you will be truly free from the ego’s grasp and control, and you will find true happiness in Divine love as self-love and love of others.
This is an important teaching for all of you to help you free yourselves from the torments and pains you experience in loving yourselves and others. Divine love is here for you always.
The idea of the ego’s love machine surprised me. But when I look at myself honestly, I can see its workings in my life. The more I recognize this impostor and choose to receive God’s love instead, the less the ego’s love machine controls my life. And in my experience, ego love can’t compare with the depth, beauty, and power of Divine love as self-love and love of others.
I encourage you to practice what the Divine shared in this message. You too may be surprised to find how liberating it is to let the ego’s love machine rest in peace.
If you enjoyed this post, please visit my blog to read other inspiring messages from the Divine. I’d also like to offer you my free self-love eBook, which contains many beautiful and uplifting quotes from the Divine.
